Saturday, March 31, 2012

number twenty two.

this time last year eliza and i were getting ready to make the long trip back to korea.

we flew home with open ended tickets to visit and especially to be with grandma. she had been sick for awhile, in hospice, and everyone thought she'd be dancing with Jesus soon.

we weren't sure how long we were going to be there, but decided no later than april.

we had recently found out i was pregnant with delia when we left at the end of january.

i was sick on the plane, and sick most of the time we visited.

it was still worth it.

we got another 4 generations picture together.

i assumed it would be our last.

the end of march came, and we were the ones saying goodbye. grandma was still fighting.

i told her i loved her, thinking it would be the last time i kissed her.

in may we got that news on that ultrasound.

we scrambled to get home as soon as we could.

we made it back to the states in the middle of july.

delia came a month later...a month earlier than expected.

grandma was still here.

she made the trip down for delia's funeral and got the chance to hold her 22nd great grandchild.

when they wheeled her into the church i saw a side of her i had never seen before.

she was overcome with emotion and couldn't get her hands on delia fast enough.

we had to be careful when passing delia. the way her body was. grandma didn't want to be careful...she wanted her!

then tears.

and pictures.

then the funeral.

that was august 25th.

on september 11th grandma put on her special shoes...left this world...danced with Jesus.

being at her funeral was harder than i thought.

of course her passing was expected, something we had been preparing for.

still, being back in a church, for the same reason, this time to celebrate someone who lived a full life. singing some of those same hymns.

it was hard.

afterwards a lady came up to me. she told me she had been praying for us and gave her sympathies...not only for grandma, but delia too.

she said she struggled with whether or not she should tell me something, but she had to.

i immediately typed it onto my phone so i wouldn't forget.

this is what she said...

your grandma just loved your delia. she talked to me about seeing her and holding her. she said "that was the greatest gift, to hold delia. it's hard for me to cry, but holding her just sobbing i said, God you would be that good to me. to let me get the chance to hold her. to let me hold on, to hold her."

what a gift, to hear that at grandma's funeral.

my brother said it had to be weird for grandma to be at delia's funeral. knowing that she would be following soon. she would be seeing her in heaven before any of us. she would get to hold her again...soon!

to know that delia has someone up there who held her here on earth and in heaven...that is a great feeling!

i miss them both, but i bet they are having fun.

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

this is who i live with...

james fell asleep while watching tv last night. once he is out it's hard to wake him, and if you do he never remembers.

me :kicking him because i already failed to wake him twice: JAMES! are you coming to bed?

him :sleepy sigh, shakes head no:

me :thinking fine, eliza climbed in our bed anyway, i'll snuggle with her. crawls in bed:

eliza :puckering up, making smooching sounds, kissing the air while half asleep: tisses! i need tisses mommy! :more air kissing: tisses! mommy, tisses!

me :thinking, i have the sweetest girl ever and this will be a great snuggle. smothers her with kisses:

eliza :pushing me: back up! doh (go) mommy! :sitting on me: doh way. :kicking me: doh work mommy! :more pushing, still hasn't opened her eyes: i'm tying to seep!

me :thinking punks! y'all stink!:

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

the one where i show my crazy side.

so more on those trees.

first you should know, i was the sort of kid that had to have every stuffed animal on her bed at bedtime because i felt bad for leaving one out.

i also used the brown crayon/marker before brown was popular because i was sad no one ever wanted that one. it worked...i have brown hair and all. :)

i am also the youngest (and only girl) of four kids. i know what it feels like to be left out.

three of us also joke that ma has a favorite.

so when i make these trees, a bit of my crazy side comes out.

with each leaf i think some of the following...

"i wonder if this person is a top of the tree kind of kid."

"are they more reserved?"

"is this placement okay?"

"maybe they'll be annoyed they are on the bottom of the tree."

"maybe they are too far away from the others."

"maybe they are too close to others."

"am i giving them a complex based on where their siblings are placed?"

"will it make them seem like their sibling is a favorite over them?"

"oh just slap it on there! no one will analyze it as much as you!"

so please...don't.

and may think i'm crazy. i admit that, but look how much care goes into each order! :)


eliza has reached the stalling stage.

at bed or nap time it goes like this...

"i need to potty."

"i need water."

"i need tovered." (covered)

"where's my puppy? blanket? bunny? tommy?"

"i need my nose wiped."

and since i'm a great...since i'm a lazy...since i'm a mom and i value the sweet relief of nap/bedtime i usually say "wipe it on your blanket!"

yesterday she said "no! i need a tissue!"

curse you exploding vocabulary!

Monday, March 26, 2012

in the shop.

the other day as i was driving i had an idea for a family tree.

i swear, these things come to me at the most random times!

so i ran home, and tested it out.

and here is the latest thing coming out (and coming out fast!) of paper lullaby.

since posting i've had so many orders for these. they make great mother's day gifts!

if or when you need more leaves just contact me and i'll send another your way. free of charge!

i'll be posting a few more in various colors and combinations too.

take a look.

and if you have a cricut and a gypsy and want to make your own i'll give you the ingredients for it!

give a hoot.

i have the original cricut, so the whole print is 8x10. it works out well though, but you can definitely go bigger!

Saturday, March 24, 2012

dear mom,

i remember you once told me you didn't want to see my face.
i wrote about it in my journal.
today, i realized how a mama can say that.
i wonder if you came in when i was sleeping, brushed my hair back, and whispered in my ear that you were sorry.

i'm sorry.

Saturday, March 17, 2012


it was a happy birthday/st. patrick's day.

hoping it continues into a happy 29th year.

a little instagram from
the day.

papa gave her a green fundip while i was still sleeping.

29 years of green pancakes.

had to share our shamrock shakes.

one of the sweetest birthday gifts, a nap in the yard! i got to do a sleeping eliza photoshoot in perfect light!

i'll have to share my real camera pics later!

hope you had a happy day too!

Friday, March 9, 2012

making memories at the new house.

i haven't posted a whole lot about our house. for those that don't know when we came back from korea we moved in to an apartment above our friend's garage. it's a real nice place, just small. we're sharing a bedroom with eliza and the bathroom is in there too. which is nice, but makes nap time hard! or if we have overnight guests they have to come in while we're sleeping.

the positives are definitely there though. our friends/landlords have 4 kids and eliza loves them! we get little treats left on our stairs. there is a friend close by on the hard days. they have a play set out back, and i hear a trampoline is coming too! it's fun.

we found a house we loved, well, we loved the land. the house needed a lot of work. so since the end of september it's been going through a complete rebuild. james is doing most of the work with help from some awesome family and friends.

his work schedule has gotten a little more hectic so he hasn't been over there as much, so things are slow moving.

today eliza and i went over just to get some of the stink blown off us and enjoy the day.

most of her toys are over there, and i wanted to see if her recent growth spurt helped her feet reach the peddles on the tricycle we got her for her birthday. (they did, but she preferred her first ride on toy after i accidentally knocked her over while showing her how to pedal)

we saw that the daffodils were blooming. she served me "toffee" (coffee) and chocolate milk. i spread out a blanket and caught up on some reading.

it was a beautiful day!

here are a couple of my favorites.

daddy took a break to play.

she's a radio flyer junkie...or we are, and make her be too. :)

please always be my best friend!

p.s. yes, that's james. yes, he has a full beard. yes, he is still in the army. he's just lucky and gets to play the part of a terrorist. he is loving his job...for the most part!

Thursday, March 1, 2012

lost lion?

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...