Tuesday, January 29, 2013

because i'll laugh...

with you one day about this.

(warning - talks of boobs, poop, pee and vomit ahead...proceed with caution)

this is how our morning went...

our doctor wanted to see hattie for another weight check. our doctor is in a town that is in the opposite direction of the town we always go to. we needed to get something from the hospital, so we decided we'd just take her there for a weight check and call our doctor with the info.

easy enough? yea right.

as i went to put maggs in his box he decided to turn around and walk back out of the room completely ignoring me. eliza got mad because i told her he didn't need any treats. i got him in his box, and somewhere in there i must have not latched it right, or we have a houdini dog. more on that later.

we drove up to the hospital to get hattie's medical records. not too much of a hassle after we got it sorted out.

went up to the nursery to see if they would weigh her and save us a trip to the doctor.

she was weighed (and gained!) and we were on our way to hell...aka walmart to return a few things and pick up some other stuff. simple trip.

when we got in the car we tried to find hattie's weight at discharge so we could tell our doctor that, along with the weight she is now. couldn't find it anywhere in the papers. just saw something that was crossed out and error written on it.

james went back in, the lady said she remembers her chart and it basically came down to "we don't know what her weight was."

off to walmart. where i got annoyed with the lady at customer service and ended up not being able to return something. so we left for target.

got what we needed then headed home. all this time i was overdue to nurse hattie and i was feeling it!

arrived home to a dog that was waiting for us at the door, not a good thing because that meant the garbage would be emptied out and torn apart. and it was.

james went to work on that, while i tried to nurse a sleepy hattie on an engorged boob. stripped her down to wake her up. after a few minutes i stopped to burp her and she had an explosive poop. so explosive it shot out the back of her diaper, got on my pants, her back, and some landed on my lips. :shudder:

freaked out, took her to the changing table, tried to figure out the best way to tackle the situation. james was vacuuming up coffee grounds now, so he didn't hear when eliza said i needed help.

took the poop filled diaper off hattie, picked her up to wash her back, and she peed all over the pack 'n play and floor.

awesome.

finally got her clean, washed myself, and sat back down to finish nursing her.

a friend was due to stop by soon because of course this stuff happens at just the right moment, and the living room was a mess.

james was picking up, eliza was lounging, maggs was in his box, i was nursing hattie.

then she decided i didn't have enough. now, eliza was a big puker, i'm used to spit up, but what happened next topped all of her pukes.

hattie pulled away, puked and it was the equivalent of someone dumping a bowl of warm water on her, me and our bed.

seriously?

it was one of those moments that if she didn't still have her stump attached i would have just jumped in the shower with her because i didn't know what else to do. we were both covered...again.

10 minutes later life is fine, we all have clean clothes, laundry in the wash, friend visiting with warm banana bread in hand.

ahh life with a newborn.

at least eliza wasn't causing trouble through all this or i seriously would have lost it!


5 comments:

Emily Cook said...

haha!!! You will laugh later... but I shudder with you. and .. i've had it on my lip before too :) YUK!

Amber said...

I have to admit, while i've been peed on and puked on by someone else's kid mind you, poop on the lip, tops all that. Hope your day gets better!

Krista Murphy said...

Hang in there Mama! Just as a side note, I found the best stain stick to get out breastfed baby poo: OxiClean Maxforce Gel Stick. One time O pooed on my pants while we were PCSing here, I put it on while I was wearing them (I did not have a change of clothes) and that night the stain was gone.

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