as she tried to fall asleep tonight.
two hours after she went to bed, i came in to use the bathroom, she was still up.
"seep with me mama!"
"i will lay down for a little bit."
crawling in next to her in our bed.
"no mama! that's my blanket, pillow, tommy, dandra..."
"okay! i wasn't taking them."
"here, delia's blanket."
"thanks...eliza, do you remember seeing delia?"
"at the hospital?"
"do you remember when we had to say goodbye at church?"
"and everyone was sad?"
"do you ever dream about her?"
"do you sometimes see her?"
"in your head?"
busts out in complete giggles..."my head?! noooooo!!!!" continues giggling.
"you know you can talk to her right? anytime?"
and so it went...
i am sure a lot of those "yes" answers were just automatic answers, but i still like talking about it with her.
oh i wonder how much she does remember at this age.
she pulls out random memories of places we've been, or things we've done that surprise me.
our doctor said they are quite good at things like that.
if we keep talking about it can she hold on to some of those? can she remember?
please, let her remember.