Wednesday, May 16, 2012

please leave a message...i'm living hands free.

i recently read this article and was inspired.

it opened my ears and made me finally listen to that voice that always nags me.

put down your phone. you don't need to be on the computer right now. another movie? play with her!

when she was new and we were living in georgia i put my laptop in the bedroom. i had read another blog about not wanting your kids to remember you with a laptop on your lap. i want her to remember me, how i made time to just be with her.

she spent most of her time in the living room, so i was aware of leaving her if i wanted to just hop on and check my email.

it was a good decision. it made me a better mom.

then we went to korea. the computer stayed in the bedroom, and for the most part we didn't have tv.

i'd turn on music and we'd spend all day just playing, learning, enjoying.

we let her watch a 1/2 hour of tv a day. usually when i was cooking dinner and needed her to not grab my legs while i'm standing at the stove.

then we moved home. got smartphones. still no tv, but we have movies. lots of movies. and now she is interested in them. loves them.

it was all too easy after we lost delia to just pop in a movie, and lay around feeling sad.

it became a habit. first thing she asks for when she wakes up is milk and a movie. it gives me time to catch up and wake up!

i want to change that. i know part of the problem is we don't have space here, or all her toys, but we should just get that more creative!

how is it that in korea, we could go days without leaving the apartment and it was fine. here we are out almost every day, but yet i still throw away the time at home with just her?

i'm also aware of my phone usage. in georgia i wanted a land line just because i missed that. not being able to be reached ALL THE TIME. if i don't answer an email, text, fb message asap i sometimes get another email, text, fb message just to see if i got the first one.

i don't want to be that available. to feel like i have to answer right away! it stresses me out.

i try not to use my phone when i am out with other people, just out of respect. i hate when ma answers her phone when i call and she says "i'm at dinner, bible study, the store checking out, can i call you back?" i always say "you didn't have to answer in the first place!" (love you ma!)

i should have that same respect for those i love the most, eliza and james.

so when we are out my phone will be off, or on silent. i'll try not to check my email at red lights. i'll just be.

when we are home i want to eat lunch with eliza. if james can't be home for dinner i want to still have dinner with just her. no phone.


my phone doesn't need to be under my pillow. even if i use it as an alarm clock. they have things for that. they are called alarm clocks. i need one.

i got a cord for my cell phone and i plan on mounting a cradle so i can hang it up at the new house. that way it will feel more like a land line.


i need to do this.

i need to break free and live hands free.

james will thank me. especially since he pays the bills. ;)

i'll need help though. it's an addiction. it'll be hard. baby steps.

and if i don't reply until after she goes to bed, or takes a nap, just be patient. we have living to do!

all i want in my hand is hers or his, and maybe a crayon or toy, and definitely a camera!

join me?


Christina said...

I love this! I worry a lot about how technology will play a role in shaping our baby. I am definitely way too attached to my iPhone and I need to implement some ground rules for myself regarding computer/phone time.

Tesha said...

great post! We do not have a TV or smart phones. I never used the computer much then Jonathan died and all of my support has been online. I have spent to much time on the computer lately. I know that this is a season and the support really has helped soooo much but I do not want it to be a habit. It is always a good decision to put your family first!

GV said...

I agree! Nick and I have decided to do this this summer, we've both been migrating away from the internet more and more lately and finding "real life" stuff to do.

I love the idea of putting the computer in another room, I think we're going to do that right now.

Emily Cook said...

shel, I am so with you. that post, that entire blog has been on my mind this week. It IS an addiction, and I'm an addict with you.

My little people need me- not just my body, but my brain too!

Kelly Pifer said...

I am in the midst of going hands free myself. It is so darn easy to be connected and so very liberating to disconnect myself. Now if only I can get my husband on board........

Ashley J. said...

LOVE love love it!!! Our first year of marriage Joseph and I didn't have consistent internet or any tv and it was fabulous! I definitely have people get on my case for not texting or having facebook...but it's nice to have the freedom from those things.

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